Existentialist Pizza
.
.
.
I was eating pizza the other day
but it wasn't pizza, it was a kind of 'not' pizza
the kind you microwave
and then stare at the greasy cardboard for five minutes
before taking a bite
it isn't real, but it IS pizza
in a kind of existential way
it's like an iPizza
it's semi-transparent, comes in five trendy colors
and is in no way compatible
with your current pizza cutting tools
it's got me thinking of real food
of pasta, and ethnic delicacies I've never experienced
things to transport me
anywhere but here
anything but
not this freeze-dried memory on a tray.
I wish I had the drive to cook
or the car to drive to go and get anything
or any idea how
to make the dough and cut the meat
and spread the sauce and bake the crust
but I don't
and I'm not very good at faking it
I'm just the worlds used pizza box
living without purpose like this
wishing I had the drive to plan ahead
and a car to get me there
any idea on how to afford it
or be decisive
but I'm just destined to be the half-forgotten leftovers in the fridge,
and the greasy cardboard husk of me to be moved from shelf to shelf
to trash and, not recycled
to burn
in a kind of existential way
I was eating pizza the other day
it was kind of not 'not' pizza
it wasn't real, and yet it was
and it made me hungry
hungry to live
better than I am
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Comments
Good rythm and choice words, I love the whole thing. I wish I could say more but I'm currently too tired to think.
Submit this stuff more often, I mean it. You've got a lot of creativity and the talent to back it up.
--
As Zookeeper of the Internet it is my responsibility to feed the trolls.
It's an ugly job but some one has to do it.
now, this isn't the first poem you've written about living a better life. If memory serves me correctly, you've written a few. Through these poems, it's become apparent that you have that drive to make your life just as amazing as you want it to be. But by the same token, the fact that you are still writing these poems says to me that perhaps you are not yet utilizing that drive that you clearly have.
Don't get me wrong, my comment is not intended to discredit you or put down the poem at all. Actually, I really liked this poem. It was funny but at the same time it made me think about my own existance.
but I digress. My point is: you have so much potential in so many things. Once you find that drive in you, you will be able to attain the amazing life that you deserve (sorry if that sounds cheesy but I mean it genuinely)
--
"Nothing would ever change if rules were never broken."
--
alienation, your children are dead to you
but their dreams are alive
they will rise up;
and where will you be then?
you will be lost
--
alienation, your children are dead to you
but their dreams are alive
they will rise up;
and where will you be then?
you will be lost
We cant stop wanting to be better, you see? Otherwise we wont ever move at all .. I dont think its going to be an event. Its perpetual change and growth throughout our lives.
You do have a point though
the mindset I have to get past is that Im NOT anything right now, and actually have some self worth
thats going to be the real process. The drive is there, but the assurance and the hope isnt as much. Thats what I need to find. Thats what Ill still keep looking for. And that is whats gonna keep me writing too. Life isnt allways going to be happy and perfect and beautiful... that would be almost shallow. But it will allways be right, because God works in our lives and so I can allways have faith in that. So dont loose hope in me... and I will find mine too. -j
--
alienation, your children are dead to you
but their dreams are alive
they will rise up;
and where will you be then?
you will be lost
It's a joy to read your pieces.
--
I guess things like this start for me from feeling unhappy with my current state, and while I cant change it, I can write about it... and they will start with lines like 'Im heavens own used pizza box' [the original version] and go from there. Sometimes its all I need to put things into perspective and move on. I genuinely thank you for your feedback, and for enjoying my writing. Its hardly anything special, but Im very very glad you like it. -jasper
--
alienation, your children are dead to you
but their dreams are alive
they will rise up;
and where will you be then?
you will be lost
--
~*Diane*~
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